Monday, January 22, 2018

In the Dark

I just can't seem to get my head into the right space this year at all. I know it's only January but I feel like I'm drifting. Staying in bed past noon yet during the night I wake up several times to go to the bathroom. I've been having fights in my dreams and that usually only happens when I'm feeling stressed. The thing is during the day I don't feel stressed so much as I feel bored and restless. Listless almost though I can still focus for a little while at least on a book or a game.

Its so confusing, I know I am probably having a depression episode but ... It's too early in the year for the February Blahs and I have no idea what else might have kicked it up. Actually now that I think about it I wonder if it has something to do with my son spending a couple of days in jail after eight years without any problems. That could have triggered it, now I just gotta find a way to get myself back.

If you know depression you know what I mean. I thought hey I'm doing great only a few days ago but in the intervening days something changed and I'm back to dragging my ass. I want to scream but I don't even have the energy for that. 

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