Reshape: The Point Is To Go Looking

When I began this process at the beginning of September, I expected it to go like most of the December ones. Look back on the year, decide what worked and what didn't, then make a comprehensive plan for October 2026 to September 2027. A set of goals—self-improvement ones, of course.

But that is not what happened.

Oh, the look back was about what I expected, except that some of the things I thought had happened this year were different from what actually happened. Memory is funny that way. Looking at the year I actually lived gave me a slightly different story from the one I remembered living.

From there, I went looking for the motivation behind my life as it is right now. What makes me tick? Again, curiosity came out on top, which wasn't exactly a surprise. But the other things had never really been written down in concrete form before. I found five things that seem to make my life the life I want to live: discovery, purpose, momentum, flexibility and evidence. Each one underlies who I am and what I need in order to live my best life.

The third step didn't do at all what I expected.

For most of my life, I've said at one time or another that I wanted to be “normal.” By normal, I meant all those unwritten rules society seems to have about how we're supposed to live. You're supposed to have a best friend. Home cooking is always better. There are certain things adults are supposed to do and certain ways a good life is supposed to look.

What I wanted was to be just like everyone else. What I actually needed was to be my own unapologetic person—someone who has rules, certainly, but doesn't necessarily follow conventional ones.

During this assessment I discovered that I'm actually happy without some of the things I thought I was supposed to want. I'm a loner and an introvert whose strongest relationships centre around my family. That's me. None of this was particularly unexpected. It was just odd to finally see it written down and realize there wasn't actually anything there that needed fixing.

My first attempt at applying all that knowledge went completely off the rails. What I ended up with was a process better suited to managing an elderly adult or a disadvantaged child. There was no flexibility in it. It was directing me through daily routines and telling me how to manage my life.

Not my cup of tea at all.

I don't like to be “managed.” It irritates the shit out of me when other people direct me down the path they think I should take instead of letting me find my own. And oddly enough, that was the thing that finally pointed me toward the year I actually wanted: let me find my own path.

That thought drove me outward.

I've done the internal reviews and walked the self-improvement path for more years than I care to admit. In this past year, I've been having a great time on my little adventures, wandering wherever my feet take me, photographing what catches my eye and coming home curious about things I didn't know existed a few hours earlier.

So this year I chose something different, something that plays to the way I actually operate.

 Venture.

When I first found the word, I thought of it as a larger version of Try. I still do. But there is also a little bit of a dare hiding inside it to stop dwelling quite so much on the internal landscape and venture farther into the world on my own.

I want to relearn some independence and courage. I want to test my limits without doing anything extreme. I want to indulge my curiosity and see what happens when the question becomes “What will I find?” And I want to put my camera to work even more because I like seeing the world through the lens.

That became the metaphor for my twelve themes this year. Each one is a different lens into the world beyond my usual limits—a curiosity-led exploration of what is outside my door.

Close to Home. Traces of the Past. Colour, Shape & Light. The Ingenuity of Easier Living. Canada Through Many Cultures. Gardens & Growing Places. Food Before the Grocery Store. The Past Made Present. Exploring My Roots. Wild Things. Neighbourhoods. Street Art.

Some will keep me fairly close to home. Others may take me farther away. Some will send me outdoors, some into museums or neighbourhoods, and some down research rabbit holes after I get home. My camera will come along for much of it, and what I discover will find its way into the Daybook, the blog, Instagram and Pinterest when there is something worth sharing.

But these aren't twelve assignments I need to complete.

The point is to go looking.

I will no longer sit at home hoping to be invited to go somewhere or do something. I'll take myself there, and I will enjoy myself while doing it. I'll feed my curiosity and strengthen my wanderer's soul.

Who knows? I might even learn a thing or two.